amyc321

I’m Not Okay

Yesterday I got to hear my youngest son play in the District Honors Band. This is his senior year, so it seems like everything he does is the last time. One of the songs was so moving, it had me in tears. Sitting there alone, yet surrounded by so many people, I nearly started sobbing. IContinue reading “I’m Not Okay”

Rest

In my quest for joy, I have discovered how much I long to just rest. I don’t mean that I need a nap or some deep breathing; I need emotional rest. I need the ability to just let go and have someone else be in charge. I am just so tired of always having toContinue reading “Rest”

2023

Finding joy and peace in my life has thus far been a balancing act of learning about and meeting my needs and still giving to, sharing with, and loving others. It’s been about finding that balance of having boundaries and still remembering that it’s my job as a child of God to show others grace and mercyContinue reading “2023”

Thanksgiving

I began my journey of attempting to be more grateful during the middle of my Celebrate Recovery step study about a year ago. Whenever I begin to feel down about what I’ve lost, missed out on, or never had, I just think of my small group leader reminding me to turn to my Gratitude List. Continue reading “Thanksgiving”

Love Your Neighbor

We live in a world where sacrifice is a dirty word, especially if it pertains to self-sacrifice. This modern era focuses on self-love and self-care, but seems to forget that we are also to love and care for others. If you haven’t been in a place in your life where you could no longer do itContinue reading “Love Your Neighbor”

Sabotaging the Good

In my Celebrate Recovery group, we talked a lot about how working through our issues is like peeling an onion. You peel away one layer and there’s another underneath it to work through. I know that this self-doubt I have that causes my lack of trust is a very big layer for me. I wasn’tContinue reading “Sabotaging the Good”

Too Broken?

So, what did my last post have to do with my inability to trust? It definitely was not an attempt to bash my ex, just explain my thought process. As I’ve said before, I did my fair share of wrongs to cause problems in the marriage. No one is perfect. I also did more thanContinue reading “Too Broken?”

Too Much or Too Little?

I want to talk about a topic that is often only used to describe the actions of women. I want to discuss withholding, a term used mainly to describe women using sex as manipulation in a relationship. But I want to discuss what I feel is the much bigger issue of withholding. The emotional withholdingContinue reading “Too Much or Too Little?”

To Trust or Not?

I’ve made a lot of progress over the past two years. I’ve managed to release a lot of my triggers, regained the self-confidence that was sucked out of me, and learned to set boundaries with my ex and others. I’ve also learned that I don’t care much for superficial, fake friendships. The friends I lost whenContinue reading “To Trust or Not?”

My Plan vs Reality

I’ve been really struggling the past few days. I know I lost a lot with my ex-husband’s affair and our divorce, but I’m usually really good about focusing on the future and the possibilities that lie ahead. I had a reminder this weekend that sometimes our losses are far greater than we initially realize. SomeContinue reading “My Plan vs Reality”